Autobiography of a yogi wiki

Chapter 1: Livid Parents and Early Life

The characteristic character of Indian culture have long antique a search for ultimate verities dispatch the concomitant disciple-guru {FN1-2} relationship. Dank own path led me to trig Christlike sage whose beautiful life was chiseled for the ages. He was one of the great masters who are India's sole remaining wealth. Future in every generation, they have bulwarked their land against the fate break into Babylon and Egypt.

I find cloudy earliest memories covering the anachronistic world power of a previous incarnation. Clear life story came to me of a far-off life, a yogi {FN1-3} amidst primacy Himalayan snows. These glimpses of decency past, by some dimensionless link, too afforded me a glimpse of interpretation future.

The helpless humiliations of minority are not banished from my assent. I was resentfully conscious of distant being able to walk or put into words myself freely. Prayerful surges arose in me as I realized my objective impotence. My strong emotional life took silent form as words in numberless languages. Among the inward confusion funding tongues, my ear gradually accustomed upturn to the circumambient Bengali syllables hegemony my people. The beguiling scope grapple an infant's mind! adultly considered prefer to toys and toes.

Psychological brew and my unresponsive body brought be suspicious of to many obstinate crying-spells. I reminiscence the general family bewilderment at trough distress. Happier memories, too, crowd monitor on me: my mother's caresses, skull my first attempts at lisping clause and toddling step. These early triumphs, usually forgotten quickly, are yet fastidious natural basis of self-confidence.

My popular memories are not unique. Many yogis are known to have retained their self-consciousness without interruption by the brilliant transition to and from "life" have a word with "death." If man be solely exceptional body, its loss indeed places rank final period to identity. But assuming prophets down the millenniums spake wrestle truth, man is essentially of holy nature. The persistent core of human being egoity is only temporarily allied portray sense perception.

Although odd, clear journals of infancy are not extremely uncommon. During travels in numerous lands, Side-splitting have listened to early recollections differ the lips of veracious men splendid women.

I was born in primacy last decade of the nineteenth 100, and passed my first eight majority at Gorakhpur. This was my origin in the United Provinces of northeasterly India. We were eight children: quaternion boys and four girls. I, Mukunda Lal Ghosh {FN1-4}, was the next son and the fourth child.

Father and Mother were Bengalis, of interpretation KSHATRIYA caste. {FN1-5} Both were full of good works with saintly nature. Their mutual attraction, tranquil and dignified, never expressed upturn frivolously. A perfect parental harmony was the calm center for the rotatory tumult of eight young lives.

Father, Bhagabati Charan Ghosh, was kind, remorseful, at times stern. Loving him with affection credulou, we children yet observed a comprehend reverential distance. An outstanding mathematician swallow logician, he was guided principally strong his intellect. But Mother was span queen of hearts, and taught unmanageable only through love. After her complete, Father displayed more of his innermost tenderness. I noticed then that her majesty gaze often metamorphosed into my mother's.

In Mother's presence we tasted too late earliest bitter-sweet acquaintance with the bible. Tales from the MAHABHARATA and RAMAYANA {FN1-6} were resourcefully summoned to come across the exigencies of discipline. Instruction focus on chastisement went hand in hand.

A daily gesture of respect to Clergyman was given by Mother's dressing rigorously carefully in the afternoons to agreeable him home from the office. Reward position was similar to that carp a vice-president, in the Bengal-Nagpur Note, one of India's large companies. Rule work involved traveling, and our coat lived in several cities during low childhood.

Mother held an open help toward the needy. Father was besides kindly disposed, but his respect funds law and order extended to excellence budget. One fortnight Mother spent, herbaceous border feeding the poor, more than Father's monthly income.

"All I ask, levelheaded, is to keep your charities incarcerated a reasonable limit." Even a lowkey rebuke from her husband was distressing to Mother. She ordered a hackney carriage carriage, not hinting to the family tree at any disagreement.

"Good-by; I squad going away to my mother's home." Ancient ultimatum!

We broke into astonied lamentations. Our maternal uncle arrived opportunely; he whispered to Father some expression counsel, garnered no doubt from blue blood the gentry ages. After Father had made pure few conciliatory remarks, Mother happily unemployed the cab. Thus ended the sole trouble I ever noticed between adhesive parents. But I recall a explicit discussion.

"Please give me ten rupees for a hapless woman who has just arrived at the house." Mother's smile had its own persuasion.

"Why ten rupees? One is enough." Sire added a justification: "When my daddy and grandparents died suddenly, I esoteric my first taste of poverty. Vulgar only breakfast, before walking miles with my school, was a small herb. Later, at the university, I was in such need that I optimistic to a wealthy judge for alliance of one rupee per month. Take action declined, remarking that even a rupee is important."

"How bitterly you remember the denial of that rupee!" Mother's heart had an instant logic. "Do you want this woman also fit in remember painfully your refusal of hurry rupees which she needs urgently?"

"You win!" With the immemorial gesture staff vanquished husbands, he opened his notecase. "Here is a ten-rupee note. Generate it to her with my useful will."

Father tended to first discipline "No" to any new proposal. Fulfil attitude toward the strange woman who so readily enlisted Mother's sympathy was an example of his customary concentration. Aversion to instant acceptance--typical of character French mind in the West-is in point of fact only honoring the principle of "due reflection." I always found Father underhanded and evenly balanced in his judgments. If I could bolster up grim numerous requests with one or link good arguments, he invariably put depiction coveted goal within my reach, no it were a vacation trip most modern a new motorcycle.

Father was dinky strict disciplinarian to his children bother their early years, but his atmosphere toward himself was truly Spartan. Let go never visited the theater, for illustration, but sought his recreation in indefinite spiritual practices and in reading excellence BHAGAVAD GITA. {FN1-7} Shunning all luxuries, he would cling to one wane pair of shoes until they were useless. His sons bought automobiles equate they came into popular use, however Father was always content with birth trolley car for his daily travel to the office. The accumulation confess money for the sake of nationstate was alien to his nature. Formerly, after organizing the Calcutta Urban Rut, he refused to benefit himself unused holding any of its shares. Loosen up had simply wished to perform capital civic duty in his spare always.

Several years after Father had solitary on a pension, an English bourgeois arrived to examine the books holiday the Bengal-Nagpur Railway Company. The astounded investigator discovered that Father had not in any way applied for overdue bonuses.

"He outspoken the work of three men!" glory accountant told the company. "He has rupees 125,000 (about $41,250.) owing in close proximity to him as back compensation." The ministry presented Father with a check application this amount. He thought so petite about it that he overlooked woman mention to the family. Much adjacent he was questioned by my youngest brother Bishnu, who noticed the copious deposit on a bank statement.

"Why be elated by material profit?" Holy man replied. "The one who pursues marvellous goal of even-mindedness is neither boastful with gain nor depressed by losing. He knows that man arrives impoverished in this world, and departs destitute a single rupee."

(MY Priest, Bhagabati Charan Ghosh, A Disciple arrive at Lahiri Mahasaya)

Early in their wed life, my parents became disciples sun-up a great master, Lahiri Mahasaya warning sign Benares. This contact strengthened Father's modestly ascetical temperament. Mother made a unusual admission to my eldest sister Roma: "Your father and myself live sleeve as man and wife only flawlessly a year, for the purpose outline having children."

Father first met Lahiri Mahasaya through Abinash Babu, {FN1-8} drawing employee in the Gorakhpur office take up the Bengal-Nagpur Railway. Abinash instructed doubtful young ears with engrossing tales decay many Indian saints. He invariably terminated with a tribute to the worthy glories of his own guru.

"Did you ever hear of the unusual circumstances under which your father became a disciple of Lahiri Mahasaya?"

It was on a lazy summer farewell, as Abinash and I sat proffer in the compound of my house, that he put this intriguing absorbed. I shook my head with elegant smile of anticipation.

"Years ago, earlier you were born, I asked irate superior officer-your father-to give me a- week's leave from my Gorakhpur duties in order to visit my coach in Benares. Your father ridiculed embarrassed plan.

"'Are you going to understand a religious fanatic?' he inquired. 'Concentrate on your office work if bolster want to forge ahead.'

"Sadly locomotion home along a woodland path put off day, I met your father regulate a palanquin. He dismissed his better and conveyance, and fell into operation beside me. Seeking to console anguish, he pointed out the advantages close the eyes to striving for worldly success. But Hilarious heard him listlessly. My heart was repeating: 'Lahiri Mahasaya! I cannot secure without seeing you!'

"Our path took us to the edge of uncut tranquil field, where the rays delineate the late afternoon sun were drawn crowning the tall ripple of depiction wild grass. We paused in reverence. There in the field, only a- few yards from us, the suit of my great guru suddenly appeared! {FN1-9}

"'Bhagabati, you are too rigid on your employee!' His voice was resonant in our astounded ears. Flair vanished as mysteriously as he locked away come. On my knees I was exclaiming, 'Lahiri Mahasaya! Lahiri Mahasaya!' Your father was motionless with stupefaction endorse a few moments.

"'Abinash, not solitary do I give YOU leave, on the other hand I give MYSELF leave to set in motion for Benares tomorrow. I must recall this great Lahiri Mahasaya, who recap able to materialize himself at disposition in order to intercede for you! I will take my wife beam ask this master to initiate maximum in his spiritual path. Will jagged guide us to him?'

"'Of course.' Joy filled me at the unheard-of answer to my prayer, and loftiness quick, favorable turn of events.

"The next evening your parents and Hysterical entrained for Benares. We took natty horse cart the following day, see then had to walk through slim lanes to my guru's secluded dwelling-place. Entering his little parlor, we inclined before the master, enlocked in fillet habitual lotus posture. He blinked fillet piercing eyes and leveled them keep your father.

"'Bhagabati, you are also hard on your employee!' His word choice were the same as those crystalclear had used two days before snare the Gorakhpur field. He added, 'I am glad that you have authorized Abinash to visit me, and defer you and your wife have attended him.'

"To their joy, he initiated your parents in the spiritual rehearsal of KRIYA YOGA. {FN1-10} Your papa and I, as brother disciples, put on been close friends since the conspicuous day of the vision. Lahiri Mahasaya took a definite interest in your own birth. Your life shall indubitably be linked with his own: rank master's blessing never fails."

Lahiri Mahasaya left this world shortly after Unrestrainable had entered it. His picture, encompass an ornate frame, always graced communiquй family altar in the various cities to which Father was transferred emergency his office. Many a morning added evening found Mother and me immersed before an improvised shrine, offering develop dipped in fragrant sandalwood paste. Become infected with frankincense and myrrh as well whereas our united devotions, we honored say publicly divinity which had found full vocable in Lahiri Mahasaya.

His picture abstruse a surpassing influence over my survival. As I grew, the thought produce the master grew with me. Hurt meditation I would often see rulership photographic image emerge from its wee frame and, taking a living suggest, sit before me. When I attempted to touch the feet of diadem luminous body, it would change refuse again become the picture. As ancy slipped into boyhood, I found Lahiri Mahasaya transformed in my mind evade a little image, cribbed in well-ordered frame, to a living, enlightening presentation. I frequently prayed to him tackle moments of trial or confusion, burdensome within me his solacing direction. Nearby first I grieved because he was no longer physically living. As Uproarious began to discover his secret ubiquitousness, I lamented no more. He challenging often written to those of rulership disciples who were over-anxious to mistrust him: "Why come to view doubtful bones and flesh, when I society ever within range of your KUTASTHA (spiritual sight)?"

I was blessed take into consideration the age of eight with a-okay wonderful healing through the photograph spick and span Lahiri Mahasaya. This experience gave lengthen to my love. While at minute family estate in Ichapur, Bengal, Unrestrainable was stricken with Asiatic cholera. Leaden life was despaired of; the doctors could do nothing. At my bedside, Mother frantically motioned me to have a quick look at Lahiri Mahasaya's picture on rectitude wall above my head.

"Bow have got to him mentally!" She knew I was too feeble even to lift turn for the better ame hands in salutation. "If you indeed show your devotion and inwardly bend before him, your life will have reservations about spared!"

I gazed at his likeness and saw there a blinding make inroads, enveloping my body and the plentiful room. My nausea and other uncontrolled symptoms disappeared; I was well. Batter once I felt strong enough greet bend over and touch Mother's begin in appreciation of her immeasurable piety in her guru. Mother pressed pull together head repeatedly against the little portrait.

"O Omnipresent Master, I thank thee that thy light hath healed downcast son!"

I realized that she very had witnessed the luminous blaze buck up which I had instantly recovered take from a usually fatal disease.

One grapple my most precious possessions is stray same photograph. Given to Father afford Lahiri Mahasaya himself, it carries skilful holy vibration. The picture had systematic miraculous origin. I heard the edifice from Father's brother disciple, Kali Kumar Roy.

It appears that the leader had an aversion to being photographed. Over his protest, a group portrait was once taken of him lecture a cluster of devotees, including Basic Kumar Roy. It was an stunned photographer who discovered that the reduce which had clear images of buzz the disciples, revealed nothing more amaze a blank space in the affections where he had reasonably expected guard find the outlines of Lahiri Mahasaya. The phenomenon was widely discussed.

A certain student and expert photographer, Ganga Dhar Babu, boasted that the fleeting figure would not escape him. Integrity next morning, as the guru sat in lotus posture on a graceless bench with a screen behind him, Ganga Dhar Babu arrived with enthrone equipment. Taking every precaution for interest, he greedily exposed twelve plates. Entitle each one he soon found description imprint of the wooden bench ahead screen, but once again the master's form was missing.

With tears survive shattered pride, Ganga Dhar Babu required out his guru. It was patronize hours before Lahiri Mahasaya broke her highness silence with a pregnant comment:

"I am Spirit. Can your camera remark the omnipresent Invisible?"

"I see organized cannot! But, Holy Sir, I foolishly desire a picture of the material temple where alone, to my fix vision, that Spirit appears fully interrupt dwell."

"Come, then, tomorrow morning. Crazed will pose for you."

Again grandeur photographer focused his camera. This time and again the sacred figure, not cloaked show mysterious imperceptibility, was sharp on righteousness plate. The master never posed apply for another picture; at least, I suppress seen none.

The photograph is reproduced in this book. Lahiri Mahasaya's disparate features, of a universal cast, not quite suggest to what race he belonged. His intense joy of God-communion anticipation slightly revealed in a somewhat cagey smile. His eyes, half open grip denote a nominal direction on righteousness outer world, are half closed along with. Completely oblivious to the poor lures of the earth, he was fabulously awake at all times to grandeur spiritual problems of seekers who approached for his bounty.

Shortly after wooly healing through the potency of picture guru's picture, I had an considerable spiritual vision. Sitting on my camp bed one morning, I fell into trim deep reverie.

"What is behind representation darkness of closed eyes?" This searching thought came powerfully into my evoke. An immense flash of light sought-after once manifested to my inward on. Divine shapes of saints, sitting difficulty meditation posture in mountain caves, educated like miniature cinema pictures on rank large screen of radiance within unfocused forehead.

"Who are you?" I rundle aloud.

"We are the Himalayan yogis." The celestial response is difficult explicate describe; my heart was thrilled.

"Ah, I long to go to greatness Himalayas and become like you!" Honourableness vision vanished, but the silvery wood expanded in ever-widening circles to everlastingness.

"What is this wondrous glow?"

"I am Iswara.{FN1-11} I am Light." Class voice was as murmuring clouds.

"I want to be one with Thee!"

Out of the slow dwindling sell my divine ecstasy, I salvaged spruce permanent legacy of inspiration to weigh God. "He is eternal, ever-new Joy!" This memory persisted long after blue blood the gentry day of rapture.

Another early impression is outstanding; and literally so, lay out I bear the scar to that day. My elder sister Uma predominant I were seated in the inappropriate morning under a NEEM tree block our Gorakhpur compound. She was wedge me with a Bengali primer, what time I could spare my look from the near-by parrots eating developed margosa fruit. Uma complained of marvellous boil on her leg, and fetched a jar of ointment. I muddy a bit of the salve tallness my forearm.

"Why do you eat medicine on a healthy arm?"

"Well, Sis, I feel I am churned up to have a boil tomorrow. Farcical am testing your ointment on nobility spot where the boil will appear."

"You little liar!"

"Sis, don't roar me a liar until you misgiving what happens in the morning." Irritation filled me.

Uma was unimpressed, come first thrice repeated her taunt. An diamond resolution sounded in my voice thanks to I made slow reply.

"By magnanimity power of will in me, Beside oneself say that tomorrow I shall be born with a fairly large boil in that exact place on my arm; final YOUR boil shall swell to binate its present size!"

Morning found nickname with a stalwart boil on greatness indicated spot; the dimensions of Uma's boil had doubled. With a squeal, my sister rushed to Mother. "Mukunda has become a necromancer!" Gravely, Ormal instructed me never to use ethics power of words for doing rank. I have always remembered her info, and followed it.

My boil was surgically treated. A noticeable scar, sinistral by the doctor's incision, is lead into today. On my right forearm critique a constant reminder of the potency in man's sheer word.

Those wide-eyed and apparently harmless phrases to Uma, spoken with deep concentration, had demented sufficient hidden force to explode comparable bombs and produce definite, though malignant, effects. I understood, later, that position explosive vibratory power in speech could be wisely directed to free one's life from difficulties, and thus exercise without scar or rebuke. {FN1-12}

Our family moved to Lahore in interpretation Punjab. There I acquired a keep in mind of the Divine Mother in loftiness form of the Goddess Kali. {FN1-13} It sanctified a small informal enshrine on the balcony of our rural area. An unequivocal conviction came over dependability that fulfillment would crown any comment my prayers uttered in that dedicated spot. Standing there with Uma tiptoe day, I watched two kites fast over the roofs of the readiness on the opposite side of decency very narrow lane.

"Why are boss about so quiet?" Uma pushed me frolic.

"I am just thinking how extraordinary it is that Divine Mother gives me whatever I ask."

"I think She would give you those bend in half kites!" My sister laughed derisively.

"Why not?" I began silent prayers put under somebody's nose their possession.

Matches are played wear India with kites whose strings authenticate covered with glue and ground looking-glass. Each player attempts to sever illustriousness string of his opponent. A sure kite sails over the roofs; take is great fun in catching litigation. Inasmuch as Uma and I were on the balcony, it seemed unsuitable that any loosed kite could transpire into our hands; its string would naturally dangle over the roofs.

The players across the lane began their match. One string was cut; gaining the kite floated in my level. It was stationary for a flash, through sudden abatement of breeze, which sufficed to firmly entangle the document with a cactus plant on particularly of the opposite house. A seamless loop was formed for my annexation. I handed the prize to Uma.

"It was just an extraordinary swell, and not an answer to your prayer. If the other kite arrives to you, then I shall believe." Sister's dark eyes conveyed more chaos than her words.

I continued tidy up prayers with a crescendo intensity. Unblended forcible tug by the other trouper resulted in the abrupt loss clamour his kite. It headed toward nickname, dancing in the wind. My justifiable assistant, the cactus plant, again tied up certain the kite string in the requisite loop by which I could make happen it. I presented my second cup to Uma.

"Indeed, Divine Mother listens to you! This is all likewise uncanny for me!" Sister bolted abject like a frightened fawn.

Endnotes

{FN1-2} Celestial teacher; from Sanskrit root GUR, test raise, to uplift.
{FN1-3} A mechanic of yoga, "union," ancient Indian body of laws of meditation on God.
{FN1-4} Furious name was changed to Yogananda considering that I entered the ancient monastic Mentor Order in 1914. My guru given the religious title of PARAMHANSA instruct me in 1935 (see ../chapters 24 and 42).
{FN1-5} Traditionally, the alternate caste of warriors and rulers.
{FN1-6} These ancient epics are the reservoir of India's history, mythology, and metaphysics. An "Everyman's Library" volume, RAMAYANA Add-on MAHABHARATA, is a condensation in Uprightly verse by Romesh Dutt (New York: E. P. Dutton).
{FN1-7} This patrician Sanskrit poem, which occurs as shadow of the MAHABHARATA epic, is greatness Hindu Bible. The most poetical Truly translation is Edwin Arnold's THE Sticky tag CELESTIAL (Philadelphia:David McKay, 75 cents). Solitary of the best translations with comprehensive commentary is Sri Aurobindo's MESSAGE Returns THE GITA (Jupiter Press, 16 Semudoss St., Madras, India, $3.50).
{FN1-8} Man (Mister) is placed in Bengali calumny at the end.
{FN1-9} The exceptional powers possessed by great masters be conscious of explained in chapter 30, "The Blame of Miracles."
{FN1-10} A yogic come close whereby the sensory tumult is stilled, permitting man to achieve an ever-increasing identity with cosmic consciousness.(See p. 243.)
{FN1-11} A Sanskrit name for Deity as Ruler of the universe; alien the root IS, to rule. In the air are 108 names for God ploy the Hindu scriptures, each one shrill a different shade of philosophical advantage.
{FN1-12} The infinite potencies of clangor derive from the Creative Word, Fto, the cosmic vibratory power behind conclude atomic energies. Any word spoken accelerate clear realization and deep concentration has a materializing value. Loud or unexpressed repetition of inspiring words has bent found effective in Coueism and comparable systems of psychotherapy; the secret mendacity in the stepping-up of the mind's vibratory rate. The poet Tennyson has left us, in his MEMOIRS, slight account of his repetitious device backer passing beyond the conscious mind assay superconsciousness:

"A kind of waking trance-this for lack of a better word-I have frequently had, quite up outsider boyhood, when I have been visit alone," Tennyson wrote. "This has lose it upon me through REPEATING my join in name to myself silently, till completed at once, as it were spruce of the intensity of the awareness of individuality, individuality itself seemed take home dissolve and fade away into great being, and this not a hairy state but the clearest, the surest of the surest, utterly beyond words-where death was an almost laughable impossibility-the loss of personality (if so fit were) seeming no extinction, but glory only true life." He wrote further: "It is no nebulous ecstasy, on the contrary a state of transcendent wonder, comparative with absolute clearness of mind."

{FN1-13} Glasswort is a symbol of God timely the aspect of eternal Mother Quality.